It's a disturbing trend that has shown up not only in my practice, but
among young women from church-going families. The trend involves
something called "starter marriages".
A "starter marriage" is a first time marriage that lasts five years or less, and produces no children. What is distinctive about these marriages is that they are gaining popularity among women in their early 20s.
Good Morning America's discussion on starter marriages began when they reported on a woman who got married when she was 22 years old. One year later, she separated from her husband. And by the age of 26, she was divorced. This young woman acknowledged feeling totally unprepared for what happened after the wedding day. Her comment about her short-lived betrothal was, "I view marriage as a rehearsal. Now, I am ready to play the part better because I can expect more of people and they can expect more of me...We, as the generation Xers, live in a culture of new beginnings where we can fix anything."
"Starter" or "practice" marriages have become in vogue in Hollywood as well. Notable young stars, such as Angelina Jolie, Drew Barrymore, Uma Thurman, and Jennifer Lopez, have all married and divorced in their 20s. And media proclaims these marriages as hip and the "in" thing to do. Headlines read, "Hot, Young, and Divorced." Because of the way these marriages are portrayed, teens often believe there are few downsides to these "rehearsal marriages". What deception!
Young women are encouraged to cohabitate before marriage in order to check out their compatibility with potential partners. Research does not support the idea of couples living together as a prevention to divorce. Divorce is hardly a positive experience even when it's desired, and remarriage has another set of its own problems.
Source: Dr. Linda Mintle, CBN
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